Alyssa’s Period Truth
[Originally shared August 3, 2020]
Meeting Alyssa through a similar love of dance in a buti yoga class, with her sister Toni, I knew she was a real deal. Alyssa is, to me, a super-charged woman on a mission, who spreads her impact over many kinds of people. The things that stick out to me are her amazing teaching skills and her ability to facilitate discussion. She and Toni have built Soultry Sisters from the ground up and it’s become a beautiful place for women to gather energetically. I’m so excited to share her story, one that may open your eyes to the possibility of conscious cycling.
WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST PERIOD LIKE? HOW DID IT MAKE YOU FEEL?
I got my period the summer before 7th grade. I remember getting my period so vividly because we were traveling across the country to move to Washington D.C. We stopped at a fast food chain to use the restroom and pick up something quick to eat. I remember that it was pretty late at night and I didn’t feel like getting out of the car because I was already in a deep sleep. I dragged my feet to the bathroom to appease my parents. I remember peeing and noticing a blood stain on my underwear. I was confused and I had to wipe my eyes. Why was I bleeding? Was I dreaming?
I remember calling my mom to my stall and showing her my underwear. She gasped and said she’d be right back. I remember crying because I knew I would get my period one day but I didn't imagine I’d be getting it in a fast food bathroom stall. I guess I was at the age where I romanticized all coming-of-age experiences. I hadn’t come to the reality that things just happen when they do and rarely do they play out like the “movies.” I remember feeling sad because I wanted to talk to my best friend right away, but I had to wait ‘til we got to our destination. I definitely didn’t want to talk about it in the car in front of my parents. I guess one can’t really prepare for their first period? To be honest, I had trouble planning for it for most of my adult life until I started tracking my period.
WHAT REALIZATIONS DID YOU HAVE ABOUT YOURSELF/YOUR PERIOD THAT MIGHT MOVE YOU TO CHANGES REGARDING YOUR HEALTH AND OVERALL WELLBEING?
Growing up I was super active and only had my period for 3 days. I remember hearing my friends and sister talk about bleeding and cramping, and I never really had those experiences myself. It wasn’t until I was on birth control that I started to feel hormonally affected and altered. I remember my boyfriend at the time called me moody and questioned why I was never in the mood. I was dry all the time and became very self conscious. I slowly lost confidence in myself and my libido went out the window. I didn’t feel connected to my partner or my body.
Once that relationship ended I decided to stop taking birth control pills to give my body a break. One of my friends had shared with me that birth control could affect libido and vaginal dryness. AHA! It wasn’t me! Hearing that was so validating and I was motivated to educate myself more. I will admit my motivation to learn about this was to heal from my bad relationship with my ex but It was a blessing in disguise!
Through my research I discovered the Fertility Awareness Method (FAM). I bought several books and started listening to the Fertility Friday Podcast. I learned how to practice FAM and started to build a healthy relationship with my body. Learning FAM was so empowering! I felt so connected and intune with my mind, body and spirit. Moving forward I felt more confident communicating with my partners and felt a sense of teamwork when it came to intimate relationships. Knowing my cycle helped me to better communicate when, what, and how I wanted to engage with my partner. It’s been a liberating experience! A misconception is that FAM is for when you are trying to have a baby. I’ve had many people ask me if I’m trying to get pregnant when I share that I practice FAM. The truth is, I am a planner and FAM is a tool that will help me when I am ready for motherhood.
WHAT DO YOU WISH TO SHARE ABOUT PERIOD HEALTH, CYCLE SYNCING, PERIOD HYGIENE WITH OTHER PEOPLE WHO HAVE PERIODS AND FOR PEOPLE WHO DON’T?
I took Brittney’s Cycle Syncing workshop with my sister Toni and It was amazing! I never really practiced cycle syncing before her class. I wanted to apply a holistic approach to scheduling my life and started to consciously plan around my cycle. I started to prioritize rest and relaxation during my luteal and menstrual phase. I also started to lean into being more creative during my follicular phase. It’s been a fun journey so far and I am constantly learning more about myself and what I can do to support my body.
FOR FUN: WHAT’S YOUR GO-TO HOLISTIC PERIOD PRODUCT OR RITUAL (FAVORITE CUP, UNDIES, TEA, CRYSTALS, BATH, FACEMASKS, MASSAGE, ETC.)
My go-to holistic period products are my period cup and period underwear. I also love giving myself the space to have a less active week and I like to sneak in a nap if I can!